Welcome to the Department of Strategic Cronyism — where appointments are made on the basis of *relational capital*, not intellectual merit. If you’ve ever published a groundbreaking paper that was ignored while someone’s old uni mate got the job, this department is for you.
Our Core Principles:
- Personal Alignment is Pedagogical Achievement
- Familiarity over Futurity™ – If we’ve heard of you, you’re already shortlisted
- “Trust” over “Track Record”
- References are optional — unless they come from the Vice Chancellor’s tennis partner
- All interviews pre-decided by a mysterious “informal meeting” last Thursday
“She’s not qualified, but she’s a good cultural fit.”
– Real hiring panel minutes, probably
– Real hiring panel minutes, probably
Our graduates go on to become Directors of Other People’s Work, Professors of Inherited Roles, and Senior Leaders in Not Being Challenged.
Academic Job Application
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