We Are Always Ready to Acknowledge Your Message
Whether you are a prospective student, concerned parent, exhausted lecturer, institutional partner, or member of the public who has accidentally mistaken satire for policy, please use the form below.
At Perfunctory University, we believe every enquiry deserves a process, a holding reply, and, where possible, a complete absence of meaningful accountability.
Formspree note: replace YOUR_FORMSPREE_ID in the form action with your live Formspree endpoint.
Our Commitment to Communication
We aim to respond with all the urgency normally associated with a committee meeting about whether to establish a working group. In the meantime, please consult the prospectus, lower your expectations, and remember that excellence is optional.
Perfunctory University: where every message is important enough to be processed, categorised, and possibly forgotten in a shared inbox.